• Serena Williams will play in the single and doubles finals of the Australian Open

Serena Williams is clearly an American tennis player although I couldn’t blame her if she applied for dual citizenship in Australia. My girlfriend Serena has won the Australian Open singles title 3 times, and she’s in the final for singles and doubles this year.

Making it to the finals in both singles and doubles has given Serena Williams a few distinctions. First, she passed Annika Sorenstam and now holds the title for most career prize money won by a female athlete. Second, if she wins the Australian Open singles title she’ll be one of seven women with 10 or more Grand Slam victories. Third, she’s extended her lead in the “Female athlete with the most junk in the trunk” category.

You can’t rely on American men in major tennis tournaments, but you can always count on Serena Williams and her booty. That doesn’t mean she reaches the finals of every tournament she enters. I mean that win or lose, Serena’s body is one of a champion. Like my man Bill D. said after seeing Serena in person for the first time, “That’s a woman. You gotta be somebody like Ray Lewis to handle all of that.” I hope Common’s been hitting the gym.

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