Take-Two, the company that produces Grand Theft Auto, has turned down a $2 billion dollar takeover bid from Electronic Arts. This doesn’t mean the deal is dead. In fact, it could take place April 30th, the day after GTA IV is released.. The two companies have differing opinions on the bid; Take-Two thinks it’s too low, and of course EA thinks it’s more than fair.

I don’t care what the two sides have to do, but this deal must get done. The combination of Take-Two Interactive Software Inc. and Electronic Arts Inc. could lead to the greatest video game in the history of video games.. Grand Theft Auto: John Madden.

Imagine a game with the GTA crime theme and an NFL storyline. Sorta like Playmakers for Playstation. There are endless directions to take this idea…

The game always starts easy so the first mission would be something simple.. Like using the Madden Cruiser to run over Joe Buck. After that, it’s on.

• Nashville: Take down the notorious Pacman crew that has been terrorizing local strip clubs. Score extra cash by letting the leader make it rain before you take him out.
• Dallas: Use any means necessary to keep the paparazzi away from Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson. You can earn bonus points for rushing Terrell Owens to the hospital before he starts crying.
• Miami: Kidnap Ricky Williams from a yoga studio and get him to Dolphins’ practice before he retires or gets high.
• New England: Escort Matt Walsh from his hotel to the Federal building without Bill Belichick videotaping you or eliminating Walsh.
• Atlanta: Stomp out the Bad Newz dogfighting ring, but watch out for the killer pitbulls. This task is easy if you catch one of the low level guys that is likely to snitch on his boss.
• Cincinnati: One of the hardest levels in the game. You gotta keep every member of the Bengals outta jail for 48 hours.
• Las Vegas: A final showdown in a hotel room with O.J. Simpson. You’ll have to fight Jerry Porter and Levi Jones before you get up to the Juice’s room. Once you’re there, he’s pretty much impossible to put away. I suggest using a white woman to distract him before you make your move.

Who’s not buying this game? Nobody. EA, email me so we can straighten out my royalties.
Take-Two: EA Bid Wrong Price, Wrong Time. Courtesy of The Associated Press

Tags: John Madden, EA Sports, Grand Theft Auto, NFL, video games

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z58d25so0LU[/youtube]

If O.J. is gonna get ten friends together, it would have to include a whacked out bunch like this video. The Juice, Pete Rose, Michael Vick, Tanya Harding, Bill Belichick, Mike Tyson, Jose Canseco, Ricky Williams, Tim Donaghy, Pacman Jones, and Rae Carruth make up “O.J.’s Eleven.. Gotta love Belichick with the camera… I have one question though.. Where the hell is Al Cowlings? Not just in the video, in real life. He shook O.J. like Barry Sanders did Rod Woodson.

Tags: OJ Simpson, You Tube, OJ’s Eleven, Sports, Comedy

Today is April 20, 2007. An average Friday except to the weed culture. 4/20 means Thanksgiving in April for derms potheads. They get together in celebration of cannabis… They eat, drink, and smoke mary.

I don’t know if this is true but it seems to me that 4:20 is bigger than ever this year. Three different people told me they were having or going to 4/20 themed parties. I didn’t know or consider that 2 of these 3 people chiefed trees. This is the first year anybody I know has told me they were going to a 4/20 party.

I received 4 different chain text messages with the same general theme:

PUFF PUFF PASS! This is a cellular blunt so don’t fuck up the rotation keep this shit movin’ til the whole world hits it! Happy 4/20 

or something like this:

Row row row my blunt twist it at da end.. light it up n take a puff n pass it 2 a friend… keep dis blunt goin! Happy 420

I know text messaging is bigger than ever but this is the first time I’ve ever been texted 420 chain messages.. And speaking of chain messages, forwards, all that crap. Stop sending them to me. I hate that shit. I hate it in my email…I especially hate it on my cellphone. I wasn’t responding or forwarding the blunt messages today until I was worried that all of the 420ers knew I wasn’t “passin it to the left” and would continue to bombard me. 3 of the text messages were from people not stored in my phone. Numbers that I don’t recognize.. So I sent the last two on to some more people (that are probably pissed) and low and behold.. No more chain text. Today. I’m sure I’ll get the “If you love the Lord” or “Send this for a miracle” text tomorrow.

In honor of the people honoring 4:20, I have put together a list of some of their heroes.

Nate Newton: The former member of the Dallas Cowboys was busted with 213 pounds of the ganja back in November 2001. 5 weeks later he got caught with 175 pounds. He ended up doing 2 1/2 years in Federal prison.

 Ricky Williams: The shy, weed loving, helmet wearing in an interview, running back. He made headlines for violating the NFL’s drug policy 3 times, and retiring to avoid suspension. Sticky Ricky’s hoping to be reinstated into the league this fall.

Damon Stoudamire: Mighty Mouse has had all kinds of problems with the mean green. His most memorable arrest came when he tried to get some weed wrapped in aluminium foil through an airport metal detector. Stoudamire credits a Scott Baio after-school special for helping him kick his habit.

That’s my top 3. My Michael, Magic, and Bird. My Berry, Alba, and Union. If you have anybody you think should be in the top 3 instead of who I have, lemme know.

Speaking of marijuana. This week Pro Football Weekly reported that Georgia Tech WR Calvin Johnson, Clemson DE Gaines Adams, and Louisville DT Amobi Okoye admitted to smoking marijuana. In the past players such as Warren Sapp and Randy Moss have dropped down the draft ladder due to being associated with marijuana. This is always funny to me.

If a guy has smoked some kush in the past, he’s not worthy of being drafted in the top 10, but it’s ok to go later in the first round? General managers that draft early have more scruples than gm’s that draft later? I don’t get that. It seems the only thing the league wants to do is lower the guys signing bonus. If you go lower in the draft, your chance of going to a better team increases. Wouldn’t it be more detrimental to a top pick to wind up on the Lions rather than the Rams, Steelers, or Jaguars?

Message to draftees from the NFL: If you’re a first round stud and want to make sure you end up with the Chargers, admit to blazing the buddah a few times your senior year. You’re gonna lose a little money, but you’ll play for a winner.

Five Athletes That Enjoy 4-20. Courtesy of Sportable.com

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