So today is Monday, June 21, 2010. If you follow the NBA or the Los Angeles Lakers then you know today is “Parade Day” where the team and its fans enjoy a celebration of their latest championship run in the heart of Downtown L.A.

Seems great right? Not really, especially since I’m not a Lakers fan and consider myself a member of the sports fan elite. That makes me a sort of endangered species, a fan within the city who doesn’t swear blind allegiance to the popular team and shower them with exaggerated praise.

Since the Lakers won their 16th title last Thursday against the Boston Celtics, the only team they still trail in prestige and banners (Boston has an NBA record 17, including nine won against the Lakers), I’ve had to endure an endless amount of television coverage and Homer-ism.

Every single local channel has run special segments on the team, Laker history, etc. Look, even though I wasn’t rooting for them, I know they won and people were bound to be happy. But as a person who regularly criticizes the Lakers and their supporters as the lowest class of fans, they’ve sure proven me right.

From the severely ill-informed proclamations that Kobe Bryant is now greater than Magic Johnson or Michael Jordan (how about no), the feigned ignorance about benefiting from preferential officiating and the morons destroying their own streets and cars in uh, celebration, most Lakers fans qualify as a village full of idiots.

If that wasn’t bad enough, today was like the culmination of it all. I woke up to wall to wall coverage of the Laker Parade, stock full of Kobe and his fake smiles to chumps like Sasha Vujacic thinking they actually deserve to be called NBA champs.

Sasha Vujacic getting a 2nd ring gives douchebags across the world more hope.

I’ve been dealing with simmering bitterness ever since I saw the way the fourth quarter of game 7 was turning into the same old home cooking for the Lakers (they had a 37-17 free throw advantage for the game, 21-6 in the critical 4th and 200 to 149 for the series) they’ve enjoyed on every successful championship quest.

It doesn’t matter that Boston was by far the more aggressive team for the series (they consistently drove more and shot more total field goals despite taking 20 less 3-pointers than Los Angeles) or that the referees completely changed the tempo of the otherwise greatly officiated game in the fourth.

Just like it doesn’t matter that Kobe Bryant had yet another sub par NBA Finals performance (6/24 stink bomb in his biggest career game at home and 40 percent shooting for the series), because after all, (sarcasm) he’s the greatest ever! (/sarcasm).

The only positive I’ve taken from it all was the fact that after today, I won’t have to deal with too much more ignorant nonsense. Because most Lakers fans are casual followers in the same mold as those of the New York Yankees and Dallas Cowboys, they’ll forget the NBA exists in about half an hour and find pretty butterflies to chase in amazement.

- Will.

The Sports Snob will be published once a week here on YouBeenBlinded.com. Will R. is a journalist/writer who covers sports, news and music for several websites. His music work can be found on www.WestCoastRydaz.com

Welcome to The Sports Snob, a column that gives commentary on the sports world with an elitist slant that can only come from ravenously watching it your whole life. Be warned, this isn’t a place for fair-weather or ignorant sports followers, unless they want to convert over to the real fan side.

For the introductory post I want to talk about Los Angeles Lakers fans or as many of them deserved to be called – homers, frontrunners, bandwagoners, groupies, etc.

Before any legitimate Lakers followers get all upset, relax. If you’re not a groupie this isn’t directed at you.

This is aimed as the illogical, vastly uninformed group of part-time fans who incessantly inject themselves into basketball talk during the playoffs proclaiming nonsense like “OMG we won a game, we’re the best ever!” in between rushing to buy “trendy” car flags.

I’ve also got my bulls-eye set on the comical cult of Kobe Bryant members that think he’s better than Magic Johnson or Michael Jordan. It’s hard to tell whether they actually support the organization itself or if they think Kobe came down from the heavens and created the Lakers in 1996.

As a lifelong NBA fan that religiously follows the season from the pre-season until the final buzzer of the championship, I hate reading and hearing these people. It’s a disgusting stew of vomit-inducing hyperbole mixed with an utter lack of knowledge about historical context.

For instance, take the tired storyline asking if Kobe is the greatest Laker or even worst, greatest player ever. The subject has elicited responses from legends like Jerry West to hacks like Rick Reilly.

Look, Kobe is definitely one of the top 10 NBA players ever and he’s top five in Lakers history. But people need to relax with all this nonsense about him being the best Laker when his resume still doesn’t stack up to Magic and has glaring, undeniable blemishes. With a franchise as historic as the Lakers, it’s about a lot more than just titles.

Kobe and the Lakers blew a double-digit homecourt lead in the NBA Finals, leading to his 2nd straight Finals loss.(Getty Images/ESPN.com)

Kobe revisionists are going to hate this, but oh well. In the prime of his career Kobe not only failed to carry teams to titles but openly displayed a selfishness and ego that cost him and his team playoffs wins and rings.

Like the 2004 season where he denied Phil Jackson, Shaquille O’Neal, Karl Malone and Gary Payton some hardware after he got tired of being Robin to Shaq’s Batman and flushed their title hopes away with his 38 percent shooting and 23 shots per game. After that series Phil Jackson famously called Kobe “uncoachable” and Shaq was traded.

That led to missing the playoffs with a losing record and then losing two straight series, including a historical choke against the Phoenix Suns where he blew a 3-1 series lead and gave up in the crucial game seven.

When did you ever see Jordan or Magic just flat out quit? In Kobe’s world it’s all about him, and if it doesn’t serve his interests he’ll cut and run, teammates or fans be damned.

Kobe lost a 3-1 lead and was eliminated against the Phoenix Suns in 2006. He infamously took only 3 shots in the 2nd half of the crucial game 7 loss.(Getty Images/YouBeenBlinded Illustration)

Then there was yet another first round exit leading to Mr.Laker demanding a trade, publicly berating Andrew Bynum and team management. If it weren’t for Chris Wallace and Jerry West giving away Pau Gasol, Kobe’s true colors would still be showing.

And as much as his fans try to use statistics as an argument, even those don’t match up to the sheer greatness of the two M.J’s.

Magic Johnson won five NBA championships, three regular season MVPs, an Olympic gold medal, NCAA title and three NBA Finals MVP trophies, including one his rookie year.

Jordan collected six NBA championships, five regular season MVPs, an Olympic gold medal, NCAA title, six NBA Finals MVP trophies, 10 scoring titles, has the highest career scoring average, rookie of the year and defensive player of the year.

Kobe has four championships, one regular season and one Finals MVP, an Olympic gold medal and two scoring titles.

Kobe apologists love to pretend all of the above never occurred, but it did.

It also amazes me when I see these fans badmouth Magic every time he criticizes the team. The fact that random nobodies sitting at home think they have more of a right to speak on the Lakers than Magic freaking Johnson says a lot about how dumb they really are.

Can this team win a championship? Obviously yes, and they probably will. But there’s more to a franchise as storied as the Lakers than simply just stacking rings. There’s the honor, legacies and stories of how those rings were won. The rings alone are nothing without the battles fought to earn them, and nobody knows that better than a guy like Magic.

Kobe recently said he “wasn’t a fan of Jordan.” Really? We don’t believe you, you need more people. Word to Jay-Z.(Photo by Andrew D. Bernstein/NBAE/Getty Images)

There used to be a time when only Kobe believed the nonsense he crafts about him being a great teammate and leader, about being a victim in the rape case and about being anywhere near Jordan when it comes to a winning pedigree or accomplishments. These days, thanks to moronic fans, he had the audacity to get on ABC during halftime of the Finals and say he wasn’t really a Jordan fan.

Coming from a guy who clearly idolized Jordan and has desperately mimicked him, it was incredibly unbelievable. The sad part is his fans actually tried to rationalize it as true.

It’s no shock though, because they are Laker fans. The same people who get excited about free $1 tacos during the NBA Finals or actually say stuff like this on Twitter after a pedestrian dunk from Kobe in game one;

“Omfggggg did y’all see that alleeey ooop kobe officailly gots my respect best player in the nba.” (Actual tweet)

There’s a reason why 98 percent of the people who say he’s the best are Lakers fans from this generation. Some of them might even be reading this and agree with that tweet or laugh at all this extra stuff about how rings are won. In their minds the only thing that counts is the number of rings and whether they win this year.

All I can say is, I’m not surprised.

It just helps prove why I’m a better sports fan than them.

- Will.

The Sports Snob will be published once a week here on YouBeenBlinded.com. Will R. is a journalist/writer who covers sports, news and music for several websites. His music work can be found on www.WestCoastRydaz.com

Los Angeles has long been known as the city with the enticing bright lights of Hollywood and its star-studded population, so it’s only natural that we’d be famous for loving winners. This brings us to what’s going on in the City of Angels right now with the LA Lakers holding a commanding 2-0 series lead in this year’s NBA Finals – citywide euphoria and anticipation for another championship parade with streets full of happy Purple and Gold fans.

When it comes to winning traditions, few franchises in sports as a whole – let alone the NBA – have one as longstanding and proud as the Lakers. Their hated rival Boston Celtics are the only team with more titles (17 to LA’s current 14), but the Lakers have the most Finals appearances with 30 and most playoff wins. Given that reputation, there’s not only an expectation of championships, but an almost cocky belief that title 15 is a done deal. Get in your car and drive any part of LA County from the Valley to Long Beach and you’re guaranteed to find hundreds of car flags, jerseys, hats, crazed fans and more, all gearing up for a new banner at the Staples Center.

Trust me when I say this contagious Laker-mania isn’t only affecting common fans. Celebrity fans like Jack Nicholson and Snoop Dogg are just a few of the notable names who root for Kobe and company, and the huge block party has already gotten started. That’s what’s great about Los Angeles, there’s no shortage of places to celebrate, and Snoop’s locale of choice was the Playboy mansion. The Doggfather hit Hef’s spot to perform his catalog of classics and I’m willing to bet that everyone singing along is more than just a little bit happier thanks to the prospects of a new parade in Southern Cali.

Even out of town ballers who’ve already fallen victim to the Lakers this year are in town partying it up, as Houston Rockets forward Ron Artest made clear in a few new videos that hit the net. You know Tinsletown is the new basketball hotspot when even the guy who got up in Kobe’s face and told him he’d “f*&k him up” a few weeks ago is ready to join in on the fun.

Another thing about sports pride in LA (for the Lakers and Dodgers) is that it unites the whole city in ways that most wouldn’t imagine. Everyone from the rich types out in the hills to the diehard fans in all the different neighborhoods can be seen representing for their city and team together. Be honest, what other time would you expect to see a Beverly Hills doctor dancing and screaming alongside a rapper?

Speaking of rappers, this year’s playoff run has inspired quite a few Laker fans with mic skills to show their love and affiliation to the team. Rising signed artists like Watts rapper Jay Rock (Warner Bros Records) and Spider Loc (G Unit) have recorded new anthems praising the team. (Jay Rock Lakers Song | Spider Loc Lakers Song) Others like Carson’s Roccett (Young Jeezy’s CTE West) have filmed themselves enjoying games on YouTube. Internet sensation Twitter has also regularly had keywords like “Kobe, Lakers, Go Lakers!” and more featured as popular trending topics on the site, with thousands of people across the web tweeting about the team every day.

The fanfare has even reached other states, as evidenced by the recent “Kobe Bryant” song by one of today’s most popular rappers and Louisiana native Lil Wayne. The musical ode to Kobe and his skills has garnered hundreds of thousands of combined views since its release last week and has been an instant favorite on LA radio. However, anthems and parade dreams alone don’t bring home titles, as seen by last year, which had a great anthem, but resulted in a humiliating loss against Boston.

And of course this is all happening with the Lakers only halfway toward their goal, and it isn’t completely unprecedented to fathom a Miami basketball team coming back from a 2-0 Finals deficit (Dwyane Wade against the 2006 Mavs ring a bell?), but the people of Los Angeles feel that this team is destined to bring another winner to the city of the stars. If that ends up being the case, get ready for a celebration worthy of LA’s reputation.

- Will.

Grab your drinks and raise them up to toast another memorable birthday for the most well-known “big kid” in the world: the NBA’s unstoppable Diesel, Shaquille O’Neal. The celebrated center turns 37 this week, (March 6) although it’s hard to tell with what he’s done this season.

As his career nears its end an impressive 16 years after it started, Shaq has been able to enjoy a public revival in both his game and his image, putting up numbers this year (18 points, 9 rebounds & nearly 2 blocks a game in only 30 minutes) that are higher than in recent memory and treating fans everywhere to his trademark antics along the way.

He’s second in the NBA in shooting percentage this season (61 percent) and has shot a spectacularly efficient 71 percent during his last ten games, including leading his Phoenix Suns to a win with a 45 point, 11 rebound domination of the Toronto Raptors. When Raptors star forward/center Chris Bosh suggested Shaq benefited from favorable officiating, Shaq responded with another of his classic quotes, saying “I heard what [he] said, and that’s strong words coming from the RuPaul of big men. I’m going to do the same thing (in the next meeting) I did before. Make ‘em quit and complain. It’s what I do.”

Who else but Shaq can get away with comically reducing a three-time All-Star and Olympic gold medalist into a cross-dresser? Who else has websites dedicated to their endless array of quotables and try and name any other superstar who gets on his Twitter and invites his fans to meet him for a free lunch? Those are just some of his recent highlights, and it hasn’t been restricted to off the court.

Shaq the Thespian/Musician.

After the Raptors game his recent tear was capped off with 33 points and seven rebounds in a huge win over the league-leading Los Angeles Lakers. The 78 point two-game total was his highest since 2004 and added more historic marks to his resume as he became only the third player ever to score 40 points with four different teams and joined Michael Jordan, Karl Malone and Alex English as the only players in NBA history over 35 to score at least 33 points in consecutive games. Oh yeah, he’s shooting a career high 60 + percent clip at the free throw line this season.

That isn’t a surprise, because when it comes to sports figures that are larger than the leagues they play for, few come with an image as unique and instantly recognizable as Shaq. Standing in at a physically imposing 7 feet 1 inch and weighing anywhere from his listed 325 to 340 plus pounds, the man known as the original NBA Superman and countless other monikers is quite a sight to behold.

Despite his large frame, most of his legendary status has always come from more than just the enormous footprint created by his size 23 sneakers. Shaq’s legacy entails the up and down career of a true giant in the game, from his physical dominance of the league to the surprising quickness and athleticism he possessed for a man of his size. His numbers are what cemented his place among the best big men of all time (with scoring, rebounding and block totals among the top 15 in league history), but it’s his inimitable personality that truly separates him from other greats. He’s been a rapper, movie star actor, spokesman, a Scrabble champion, out-danced LeBron and Dwight and is an all around unforgettable comedic presence. That charisma was missing from last year’s All-Star festivities and has turned out to be a timely asset to the association this year.

With the NBA facing the harsh realities of the global economic crisis, rapidly declining attendance and a turbulent situation for the host Suns during All-Star weekend, Shaq was able to instantly grab everyone’s attention with a memorable pre-game dance performance with The Jabbawockeez. He continued the night with a signature posterization of his would-be SuperCenter successor Dwight Howard and by collecting his third All-Star game MVP award. For one day during that weekend, Shaq did what he is quite possibly most loved for; he took control of the moment and gave another “Shaqtastic” performance.

It was evident from watching the fans and players at that game and most of this year that everyone in the NBA universe knows it’ll be losing a special figure when Shaq retires. People seem to be trying to soak up the best of him while he’s still around.

Shaq as Elvis. Possible after-retirement gig?

However, his “don’t call it a comeback” tour hasn’t gone without critics. They said he wouldn’t consistently contribute, that he was going to get injured or didn’t play in enough back to back games, but it’s hard to argue with his output as we near the 60th game of the year. He’s played in 52 and the Suns have a 32-20 record with him. They are less than two games out of the playoffs in a season that has seen them introduce two different coaches and desperately struggle to keep their window of opportunity open. With Amare Stoudemire lost for the stretch run and Steve Nash nursing several nagging injuries, Shaq’s role is more important than ever.

Granted he’s had his bad moments through the years, from his fitness issues to public dissing of former teammates and his infamous freestyle asking Kobe Bryant to describe a taste not fit to print. But none of it can overshadow the positives he contributed and he doesn’t seem to care much what his naysayers think anyway. “I never really worry about what Earthlings say,” Shaq recently said. “I know what I have to do. I know what I want to accomplish.”

They don’t make centers quite like Shaq, not now or in the past. To use his own recent words, “I think I’m the only player who looks at each and every center in the league and says, ‘That’s barbecue chicken down there.’” Like he told an ABC reporter after the win over the Lakers, “It’s what I do. I’ve been doing it since 1992. If you don’t believe it, Google me.”

Go ahead and give it a try. When the results pop up and you see the more than 27,000 points, 12,000 rebounds, 2,600 blocks, four championships, 15 All-Star selections, one regular season and three All-Star MVP awards, the Rookie of the Year trophy and a career that started in 1992 with 24 points and 14 rebounds a game and still collects 18 and 9 sixteen years later, it’s hard to disagree.

- Will.

Congratulations to the 2007-08 NBA Champion Boston Celtics for picking up their 17th league championship and embarrassing their hated rivals in the process. The Celtics’ 131-92 victory over the Lakers is the largest margin of victory in a championship finale. Paul Pierce was named the finals MVP, but the last and deciding game was a team effort… Right down to the post game press conferences.

It looks like the new trend is athletes interviewing the media.. And Scalabrine’s right. Everybody picked the Lakers while Boston was clearly the better team, meaning the experts don’t know shit. The only thing that could’ve strengthened Scalabrine’s position is if he had actually played in the finals.

Boston Celtics, NBA Champions, Los Angeles Lakers, sports

The Spurs rolled to their 4th championship in 9 years a little easier than I thought they would. I thought Cleveland had the chance to win at least one game in the series, I predicted two, but San Antonio was too much. The Spurs are a well oiled playoff machine. Even when they don’t win the title they’re in the mix. The Cavaliers are a franchise with a Superstar and a subpar supporting cast. They could be title contenders for years to come but they’re gonna have to shake up the roster.

The Spurs deserve their congratulations.. Tony Parker earned the Finals MVP award. Parker’s penetration, steady jumper, and clutch shots made him the hands down winner. Robert Horry picked up his 7th ring. That’s nuts. Guys are happy to play 7 seasons, Horry has 7 RINGS. Barkley, Stockton, Malone, KG, and Elgin Baylor 0 rings between ‘em. Robert Horry 7. Wow.

Props to the San Antonio Spurs, the NBA Champions.

Spurs/Cavs Game 4 recap. Courtesy of ESPN.com

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