I wouldn’t go this route but you have to respect the hustle of Pa Lor and Tia Yang. The two enterprising women from Minnesota hatched a plan that they thought would bring in some extra cash, instead they’re being indicted.

The ladies have been charged with one count of conspiracy to smuggle wildlife and one count of conspiracy to distribute and possess with intent to distribute anabolic steroids. The court papers lay out their plan:

The indictment alleges that from October 2005 to August 2006, the Yang and Lor conspired to bring wild animals into the U.S. for sale and offer wildlife for sale at a booth at the International Marketplace in St. Paul.

Asian elephant, giant squirrel, leopard cat, mongoose, flying squirrel, black-striped weasel, gibbon, leaf monkey, monitor lizard, tapir, slider turtles and small-clawed otter…to name a few.

The indictment also alleges that from October 2005 to August 2006 the two women conspired to distribute and possess with intent to distribute approximately 184 units of a substance containing a detectable amount of anabolic steroids.

I thought the Pizza Hut-Taco Bell by my crib was a weird combination, but these chicks took it to another level with wild animals and anabolic steroids. If Michael Jackson played baseball I could understand it, but since he doesn’t, who were they targeting? And how does it work?
“Can I interest you in this giant squirrel? No? How bout some ‘roids for the kids?”

Twin Cities Women Indicted For Smuggling Wild Animals, Steroids. Courtesy of My Fox Twin Cities

Minnesota, smuggling, steroids, wild animals

It looks like I’ve reached grumpy old man status.. I’m standing on corners, shaking my cane, and yelling about these kids today. The latest no good slacker youths to get on my nerves are wrestlers for Woodbury high school in Minnesota. They had a coach that cared about them and had their best interest at heart, but they threw it all away.

An assistant wrestling coach at Woodbury High School who’s accused of offering beer to team members has been fired.

A search warrant affidavit alleges the 21-year-old coach arrived at the Crown Plaza Hotel in St. Paul on Feb. 29. with a case of beer, accompanied by two high school-aged girls, and offered the alcohol to everyone in the room.

Case of beer? Girls? Can you guess what the five members of the wrestling team that were in the room did? No you can’t. They left the room and told school officials the following morning. I’m not saying that anything more than getting drunk and falling asleep would’ve happened in my day but we damn sure wouldn’t have went crying to the head coach about being exposed to women and alcohol… I know wrestlers hate the gay jokes but damn.. Don’t make it so easy.

Woodbury assistant wrestling coach fired. Courtesy of the Fort Mills Times

Tags: Wrestling, coach fired, beer, high school girls

If gambling was abolished, do you know who would suffer the most? The NFL and the NBA referees. Regardless of the NFL’s official stance on wagering, the reason the league is so popular is because of the violence, gambling, and video games. But I’m not here to call the NFL a bunch of hypocrites, I’m here to salute the gridiron gladiators. I am entertained and hopefully my picks do likewise.

I’m superstitious, so I never pick for or against my favorite team, the Philadelphia Eagles. The home team is in bold type.

Houston -3 over Kansas City: I didn’t see a lot of the Texans in preseason but I saw all of Hard Knocks.

Buffalo +3 over Denver: The Broncos are gonna have a nice season but it’ll get off to a slow start in upstate New York. Under 37 is tempting.

Pittsburgh -4.5 over Cleveland: The Browns aren’t gonna put it together over 1 summer.

Tennessee +6.5 over Jacksonville: The rule of thumb is to decide which team you think is going to win outright, and then bet on that team. I’m breaking the rule. The Jaguars win a close game.

St. Louis -1 over Carolina: If the Rams are gonna be who I think they are, they have to win this game.

Minnesota -3 over Atlanta: Joey Harrington is 1-4 lifetime vs. Minnesota. 0-4 at the Dome. The lone win came last year at home in Miami.

Miami +3 over Washington: I’m not expecting a lot from either of these teams this season but I like Miami a little more.

NYJ +6.5 over New England. I can make an argument for both teams in this game. That makes me think the game will be close.

Seattle -6 over Tampa Bay: Holmgren vs. Gruden. Hasselbeck vs. Garcia. I like the Seahawks in those matchups and the game.

San Diego -6 over Chicago: One of these teams will be almost as good as last year and the other’s qb is gonna end up costing them.

Detroit +1.5 over Oakland: It wouldn’t be Oakland if they didn’t start the season with a quarterback controversy.. Which should start about midway through the 2nd quarter.

Dallas -5.5 over NYG: The Cowboys offense gets all of the attention but that defense is gonna be really tough up front.

Cincinnati -2.5 over Baltimore: If the game was in Baltimore, I would pick the Ravens.

San Francisco -3 over Arizona: Every year is the year that the Cardinals are gonna turn it around. This might really be their time, but not this week.