David Stern put Washington Wizards guard and comedian Gilbert Arenas on indefinite timeout following Agent Zero’s failed “Four guns and a note” prank on teammate Jarvaris Crittenton. The Wizards have gone from hailing Gilbert as a $100 million savior to erasing his existence.

Arenas will never suit up for the Wizards again or possibly any NBA team depending on the outcome of the investigations and reported video of the incident. Life is funny. In high school Gilbert was voted “Most Likely To Be On A Wheaties Box.” Now his basketball career is on the verge of appearing on milk cartons.

The Gilbert Arenas Wheaties box comes courtesy of Cuzoogle who used it for their “10 Wheaties boxes you will never see” post. Well done Cuzoogstradamus.

NBA Commissioner David Stern has suspended Washington Wizards guard Gilbert Arenas indefinitely without pay for his “Guns At The Stadium” prank. The commish issued the following statement.

“The possession of firearms by an NBA player in an NBA arena is a matter of the utmost concern to us. I initially thought it prudent to refrain from taking immediate action because of the pendency of a criminal investigation involving the office of the United States Attorney for the District of Columbia and the Metropolitan Police Department, and the consideration of this matter by a grand jury sitting in the District of Columbia. For the same reason, I directed the Wizards to refrain from taking any action. Wizards personnel continue to be interviewed by law enforcement authorities, some are scheduled for appearance before the grand jury and the investigation is proceeding with the intensity that one would expect for such a serious incident.

“Although it is clear that the actions of Mr. Arenas will ultimately result in a substantial suspension, and perhaps worse, his ongoing conduct has led me to conclude that he is not currently fit to take the court in an NBA game. Accordingly, I am suspending Mr. Arenas indefinitely, without pay, effective immediately pending the completion of the investigation by the NBA.”

At least Gilbert has time to F around on Twitter and work on new gun-related comedy material. He’ll also have time to find out what “Time and Place” means.

Gilbert Arenas’ failed prank of leaving four guns, including a gold-plated Desert Eagle, in front of Jarvaris Crittenton’s locker landed Gil in trouble with the authorities. Arenas admits he’s a goofball that’s always kidding around and he says he now knows guns are no joking matter. He forgot what he learned by the time the Wizards stepped on the court with the Sixers last night.

Why Gilbert is testing David Stern is beyond me. He better get all the gunnin’ gestures and shots up that he can because Stern is going to drop the hammer at any moment.

Gilbert Arenas reportedly pulled a gun on teammate Javaris Crittenton during a dispute over an unpaid gambling debt. Sounds outrageous, I know but that’s what happens when Agent Zero and Peter Vecsey cross paths.

Arenas denies being “The new John Wayne” and took to Twitter to gun down the reports of Shaq having an affair with his fiance. 2010 is off to a great start.

Via Deadspin:

The Washington Wizards, the NBA, and authorities aren’t taking the situation as lightly as Arenas and are conducting an investigation. Even if Gil pulled the gun as a joke he’s gonna be facing a big suspension. Let’s hope it didn’t happen but it’s Gilbert Arenas so you never know.

Gilbert Arenas said long ago that he was opting out of his current contract, but he would re-sign with the Wizards if the team kept Antawn Jamison. Now it looks like Agent Zero has had a change of heart.. Or is this Gilbert being Gilbert?

From the Washington Post:

Arenas has said that he will seek a maximum-level long-term contract, one that could cover up to six years and be worth more than $120 million. However, Arenas has also said that he would be willing to take less if it helps the team retain Jamison and make other moves to improve.

I’m not an NBA general manager but I play one on this blog, and there’s no way I’m giving max money to a guy coming of two knee surgeries. I’d sign him if he wants to take the home team discount and keep Washington’s good young nucleus together, but building around Arenas at $120 mil doesn’t come off as a good investment.

Gilbert Arenas, NBA, Washington Wizards, Antawn Jamison

You’ll have to consider the source on this one but according to Gilbert Arenas, he’s staying in Washington when he opts out of his contract this summer. Arenas is one of the top prizes in the 2008 free agent pool that could feature Allen Iverson, Ron Artest, Baron Davis, Jermaine O’Neal, Elton Brand, and more. That was, until he took himself out of the mix.

“I want to see Antawn (Jamison) taken care of first and then, I’ll take a pay cut to keep the team intact“.

“We’ve been together six out of my seven years so we have an understanding. We know what it’s in jeopardy so, you know, I told him whatever he wants, give it to him, and I’ll take the pay cut. I know what he does. He’s a part of my success and I’m a part of his success so we have this one-two combination that works in this league. We know we make each other better. Someone has to sacrifice. This might be one of his last contracts so I’ll sacrifice and hopefully, I’ll get another one at the end of the day. And if I don’t, I know I did the right thing“

.

Good move by Agent Zero because.. He’s doing his part to keep the team together instead of chasing the money. He’s being a leader, and serving the greater good rather than the individual need. It’s a bad move because at 26 with multiple knee injuries there’s no guarantee that Gil’s gonna pick up the money on the back end. It shouldn’t matter because if Gilbert Arenas follows through, he is money.

Wiz at Lakers, Gilbert at it again. Courtesy of the Washington Post

Tags: Gilbert Arenas, NBA, Washington Wizards, 2008 Free Agents, Antawn Jamison

AI busted out his latest Reeboks in his return to Philadelphia. They look like some wanna be Js but what do I know? I’d go with the white ones over the black unless I could get some in all black… With “PRACTICE” on the side instead of THXPHILA.

A couple of weeks back Slam dropped the pics of Gilbert Arenas’ latest kicks. Agent Zero and Adidas teamed up with Benihana for the Gil II Zero Benihana Hibachi.

Gil’s not shy about voicing his opinion on the looks of his signature shoes. There’s no way in hell he’s happy with these. And what’s up with the colors? The shoes make it seem like he would play for the Rockets.. or the L.A. Clippers. Hmmm.

Tags: sneakers, shoes, kicks, adidas, reebok, Allen Iverson, Gilbert Arenas, THXPHILA, Gil II Zero Benihana Hibachi

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6sffEG94Uo[/youtube]

Hibachi!! Probably the best catchphrase for an athlete ever.. I dare you to name one greater. But is it hibachi or is it Gil? I mean, his swagger is so severe that he could probably yell “lawnchair” or “air freshener” and everybody would think that was the hottest ish ever… And I gotta say, EA Sports putting Gilbert Arenas on the cover of NBA Live 2008 was a genius decision. He’s loved by the video game companies’ target audience, and he’s not afraid to express himself… On the court, in print, in commercials, anywhere somebody will listen, Agent Zero is there. And God bless him for it.

Tags: Gilbert Arenas, NBA, Basketball, Video Games, EA Sports, NBA Live 2008

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